#MenstrualNarratives: The Story of Neelam (38yo, Los Angeles (USA) ): “She told me that the first three days I was considered impure and couldn’t go to the temple or touch the altar in our home. This information didn’t really jive with my new found superpowers, but I didn’t say anything.”

My mom is an obgyn so I grew up with her magazines laying about and her speaking to patients over dinner about vaginal discharge. Still, I felt unprepared. She told me what was coming but it seemed unreal, especially the bleeding part. I remember by breasts forming, the acne, and my labia growing. At the time, I thought my enlarged labia meant I had super powers! I never told anyone but I held on to the belief… And who knows, I was probably right!

The day my period came I was home with my dad. Mom was working and so I had to tell him. He became flustered and immediately called my mom to come home. I had flashbacks to the incredibly outdated video we watched in school about tying napkins to menstrual belts. Why were we watching a video about menstrual belts?? I guess being informed and feeling prepared wasn’t the goal of that particular educational movie.

My mom came home twenty minutes later. I waited for her in the bathroom. She seemed excited as she helped me put on my first pad (a very large monstrosity). Then her face turned grave and she said I could get pregnant now. I’m not sure I fully understood but I nodded. Then she told me that the first three days I was considered impure and couldn’t go to the temple or touch the altar in our home. This information didn’t really jive with my new found superpowers, but I didn’t say anything. Getting to stay home from trips to the temple seemed like a good thing at the time. More time to attend to the very serious business of recording my own MTV show and practicing to be Janet Jackson’s back up dancer.
We left the bathroom and the day proceeded at usual. But it wasn’t just any other day. The world had changed for me and I couldn’t wait to tell my friends!

#MenstrualNarratives: The Story of Ukhengching (21yo, Chittagong, Bangladesh) “we could not think to share this thing with our male teachers. In My Family I am so lucky that this thing is not stigmatized “

My first menstrual cycle experience was not bad as i was taught by my mother and she is nurse. She first taught me when i was in class 6 about this fact which every girl has to experience. That day i was in school and i was in class 7,i felt something wet in my underwear and i rushed into bathroom. Then i saw that ! But i was not freaked out and i went to my female teacher to take permission. During that time we could not think to share this thing with our male teachers. In my family i am so lucky that this thing is not stigmatized. I have seen my aunties who are not allowed to cook and touch any food during this time because they think they become impure this time. I think this condition about being impure or stigma about mensuration should be changed.

The Story of Teresa. H ( 27yo, Glendale (California)): “My dad asked me what it was, and I said that I think I started having my period today”

I went to a Catholic private school. They started what was supposed to be sex-ed in the 4th grade. We were given workbooks – “Family Life” was what they were called – which had chapters covering anatomy, sex, marriage, etc., and after each chapter was covered in school, we had to take home the workbook, read through the chapter with our parents, and have them sign a page saying we went over the content together. Usually my parents just turned to the last page of the chapter and signed it. In any case, it was around this time, the 4th grade, that I learned about menstruation.

I was a competitive gymnast until I was 14 years old. On June 1, 1998 I was at one of my practices, and went to the bathroom to pee. When I took off my leotard (ya, I was rocking my FAVORITE leotard – a plushy, teal, tie-dye work of beauty that actually accommodated my growing breasts), I noticed a red spot in the crotch area. I remember just ignoring it because I felt that something like menstruation couldn’t possibly happen to me. Puberty was for “older people,” and I never considered myself to be older (I know, that’s not how it works.). I think I tried to reason my way out of it – maybe I cut or scratched myself sometime in practice – did I straddle the beam at some point? I finished practice and went home, and when I changed to go take a shower. I put the leotard in the laundry hamper, just as I always did. After showering, I just thought that I would ask my mom about it, since it did seem a little out of the ordinary. She was a nurse, so I trusted her. I showed her the red spot that had grown a little bit over the course of the evening. I don’t remember exactly how she reacted, but it was something to the extent of her telling me that it means that I started my period. I remember her being very calm, but I know she probably wanted to cry – she always got emotional when we exhibited any sign of “growing up.” The WORST part, get this, was that she MADE ME TELL MY DAD immediately. He was in the home office, at the computer. My mom said, “Teresa needs to tell you something,” and stood in the doorway. My dad asked me what it was, and I said that I think I started having my period today. I don’t remember everything that he said after that, but he eventually said, “Well, it’s June 1st. That’s easy to remember.” And I guess he was right, I never forgot the date of my first period.

Engaging #Men&Boys to #EndVAWG (Violence Against Women and Girls) Tweetathon June 15-16, 2014

Dear Friends,

Join us! On Father’s Day (June 15th) and the Day of the African Child (June 16th) to highlight ways in which men and boys are engaged in and can mobilize to end/prevent Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG). VAWG is a grave violation of human rights and bodily integrity, that not only affects the well-being of women, but their families, their community and country-causing greater healthcare/legal expenses, losses in productivity and overall development.

This conversation is a follow-up and a response to the following ongoing campaigns: #EndChildMarriageNow (Africa Union 2-yr campaign), #TimetoAct, #MenstruationMatters, #BringBackOurGirls, #JusticeforLiz, #WEA and #TheAfricaWeWant. This is also the first in our series to raise consciousness for gender equality using hashtags #Men&Boys to #EndVAWG.

We want to know how your country is engaging #Men&Boys to #EndVAWG | what the challenges are | why it is important to engage #Men&Boys? | And is violence against women and girls a #Men&Boys issue?

Join in from June 15-16 to engage in dialogue that illustrates the progress, challenges and solutions to #EndVAWG. Please use the hashtags: #Men&Boys and #EndVAWG on Twitter and Facebook. Find our social media toolkit here, and invite your friends on Facebook.

Importantly, to help us stay in touch with you, and improve the sustainability of #EndVAWG via #Men&Boys as allies, take 2 minutes to participate in this survey.

We look forward to engaging with you on Twitter and Facebook.

In Solidarity,

Joanne Oport, MPA | @awuoroport

Deborah Dauda, MA/MPH| LEPA_Initiative@LEPA_Initiative

Kennedy Otina | Men 2 Men Program, @FEMNETProg@jakateng

#EndVAWG #Men&Boys As Allies Flier June 15-16 2014